The only real parental structure I had was a Cat Sometime You Need To Lie On The Couch And Read For A Couple Of Years Shirt list of rules on yellow legal paper that mom would stick to the fridge every morning before she bolted off to her first job. Typically, the rules would stay the same until I messed something up that mom needed to address (like not cleaning up the kitchen after I cooked), but sometimes she’d make a new list with goofy little things written on them to try and make my day a little lighter. Nestled between “don’t stay out past seven.
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Then one day–I think I was maybe nine–I came home from school and checked the list. It was a Cat Sometime You Need To Lie On The Couch And Read For A Couple Of Years Shirt new sheet of paper in a new color of pen, so I was expecting something silly to be waiting for me. Her handwriting was rushed and lopsided, and most of it was exactly the same as the previous bunch of rules. The one exception was the “joke” rule, which didn’t seem very funny: “Don’t talk to the new neighbor.
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I didn’t think anything of Cat Sometime You Need To Lie On The Couch And Read For A Couple Of Years Shirt it. I went about my routine as normal. Mom worked late and came home after I went to bed, then slept straight through my alarm the next morning when I got up for school. We never crossed paths for me to ask for clarification, so I gave myself closure by checking the apartment to the left of us on my way out. I looked through the window and found it empty. Maybe that was the joke. Regardless, the weird note ended up forgotten somewhere in the middle of a math lesson to make room for multiplication tables.
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