This story begins in a Good Batman Yelling At Catwoman Shirt game that was flawed from the start. This game started with my now ex-girlfriend crying her way out of the game(I’ve posted about that on this subreddit). Since she left we needed a new member to take her place. So the DM, who is just the best friend I’ve ever had, invited his younger brother to join us who we’ll call David. David was about age the same age as me due to my being much younger than my friend group. Anyway, it becomes the next session with a drow warlock who’s the whole village had been killed by an angel so he curses the gods. His wife has also killed an angel
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After his excessive backstory, he introduced Good Batman Yelling At Catwoman Shirt himself with a batman-Esque voice saying his name was “Lancelot MacArthur”. I roll my eyes and begin to read my character sheet. He looks at me and says”what’s so funny?” I do not respond and continue to read my character sheet, and David just stops talking to me. We were able to coexist with one another. He was obnoxious however and would try to get me killed at any turn. If we’re trying to stealth through a room, he would throw rocks my direction to send the enemy my way, he would try to have his attacks be “secretly” directed at me.
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This all came to head after a Good Batman Yelling At Catwoman Shirt long rest post-battle with some blade master. I went to grab one of the swords from the guy’s body, and David just exploded. He shouted “YOU’RE SO GREEDY, AND YOU ALWAYS GET THE COOL ITEMS” right before he hurled a fireball at me. I used counterspell, because Bladesinger wizard, and then I annihilated him due to me being a good 2 levels higher than him. Every single hit I saw his health fall dramatically and his eyes begin to water. I finally dropped him to like 7 hp and asked him if he was willing to quit to which he replied with an anime-style monologue about how he never quits.
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