I’ve often seen city sleeks musing why us mining folks live by the Pro Flora My Favorite Hooker Calls Me Mom Shirt Good Book, pride our flag and carry our gun so close to our hearts, and I can’t help but wonder if these folks even live in the same country as we do. To be fair, nowadays I’m not so sure Kentucky is the same country as New York or California. You have jobs right? And what jobs they are ! Writing on the Internet, selling things on the Internet, doing things on the Internet…. and here in the heart of mining country, you don’t even get cell reception right. See it’s different here in the mountains. We don’t know anything except mining, we can’t do anything except mining.
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Faith healing is the ultimate test of faith for the Pro Flora My Favorite Hooker Calls Me Mom Shirt patients, and ultimate betrayal of it for the preacher. It’ ’cause no practitioner of healing doesn’t indulge in trickery. The fakest of them are the ones who claim Lord God cures cancer. That’s the con artist, and no one but the hookers and addicts ever goes to these fellows. The most decent ones are merely those whose parish has fallen on hard times and must do what they do to raise the money. These folks almost always will only make every one indulge in mass prayer and send them their way. All of them do however share some common traits. I know because I have often volunteered my services for their performance.
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The first trick is to distract all people as much as Pro Flora My Favorite Hooker Calls Me Mom Shirt possible. The most effective way is to have them indulge in activities – make them stand, make them clap, make them sing. Second (and this is where I come in) is healing an actual sick man. And what I mean is a melodramatic display of curing a disabled war veteran. Sometimes I fear I might actually get injured by all the falls I’ve endured in these stagings. I hobbled up to the pastor on my crutches. I cry about how I lost the use of my legs while defending the USA from the Taliban. How the government and them fancy doctors just swindled me and took all my money away. And our healer will then tell me to not fret but believe. Believe that Lord Jesus is our savior, believe that God is by my side, believe damn it
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